| Episode 1 |
Ladies and gentlemen, allow me to introduce my batshit crazy math teacher. |
| Episode 2 |
The Fighting Frodos was the name of his fantasy football team. I think they won seventh in the league or something. He gave us status updates on them every day. |
| Episode 3 |
This actually happened. Actually, all of these are based on real events. No, I'm serious. |
| Episode 4 |
This one ISN'T about my batshit crazy math teacher. This one is about my batshit crazy CHEMISTRY teacher. |
| Episode 5 |
This was like the best day of class ever. Not many people can say their math teachers are capable of a variety of complex juggling tricks. |
| Episode 6 |
IF HE SAYS THIS TO ME ONE MORE TIME I'LL SCREAM. |
| Episode 7 |
I seriously have no idea where this came from. He actually said the thing at the top of the page in class, but I have NO idea what the context was, I wasn't paying attention. Still, quotations out of context are far more fun than logical ones.
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| Episode 8 |
Why trigonometry is the easiest class ever. This happens on a daily basis. And yet I still learn things from him. It's amazing. |
| Episode 9 |
Reciprocals! |
| Episode 10 |
He's a very visual teacher. He likes to demonstrate things. He's got this hilarious thing where he does the wave or something and it means x cubed. |
| Episode 11 |
This one is my favorite. Ever. Taken verbatim from an actual monologue. |
| Episode 12 |
A Smart Board is this really awesome thing that's like a white board that is hooked up to your computer via a projector, so you can like copy and paste images and move things you've drawn around, and all sorts of fun stuff. You can like demonstrate the motion of vectors with it, or create elaborate web organizers, or save whole pages of notes you're giving to your students. Mr. Stevenson uses it to generate "top ten" lists, the most notable of which is his dread "overrated" list. |
| Episode 13 |
Okay, so this one takes a few liberties with the truth. ...He didn't ACTUALLY get a valentine. (Haha, yes he did, and it was signed 'Frodo and Sam'.) |
| Episode 14 |
We teased him about this for WEEKS. |
| Episode 15 |
He really admires George Washington. George is on both the "top ten best Americans" list and the "top ten best non-Americans" list, with the justification that he was a British emigrant before he was an American. |
| Episode 16 |
Once more, taken word for word from an actual quote. He was gesturing like that, too. I think he was talking about something that happened in an appliance store. |
| Episode 17 |
He always gives me shit about ditching when I'm absent. He's all "Where were you? Walmart? You were totally at Walmart, I saw you there." And I'm all, "Walmart? If I was going to ditch, why the hell would I go to Walmart?" Obviously, because it's where all the cool kids go. |
| Episode 18 |
This girl's name is Dahlia. We make fun of her all the time. She hasn't figured it out yet. She always thinks we think she's joking. No, Dahlia. We're not laughing WITH you. We're laughing AT you. |
| Episode 19 |
We are TOTALLY badass. |
| Episode 20 |
The Bearshark is a creature of great power and dignity. |
| Episode 21 |
There was a sumo wrestling ring at my school's Cince De Mayo extended lunch picnic. I told Mr. Stevenson he should challenge Mr. Blankfield to a deathmatch. (Mr. Blankfield teaches AP US History and is almost as grouchy as Mr. Stevenson. Plus they both teach girls' basketball. DEATH MATCH DEATH MATCH DEATH MATCH) |
| Episode 22 |
He hates pigeons. Ever so much. My friend who has a digital camera/camcorder has a little fuzzy three minute video of him ranting about how much he hates pigeons. |
